How to Mentally Prepare For Labor: Build a Labor Coping Layer Cake
Photo by Wild Light Collective
Preparing mentally for an unmedicated birth is an important step in getting ready for the transformative and challenging experience of labor.
There are many different mental coping strategies that can be used to help keep you in a positive mindset and take the edge off of the pain you experience. These strategies can become even more effective when you layer them together to build what we like to call a Labor Coping Layer Cake.
None of these strategies will take away the strong sensations of labor of course, but the goal is to find ways to keep the brain distracted and occupied so that it is less focused on pain.
Breath Awareness - The Base Layer
Always start with the breath. One of the simplest and most effective ways to cope during labor is to turn your attention to your breath, and breathe slowly and deeply.
Photo by Wild Light Collective
Breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth, with a slow and steady inhalation and an exhalation that is just a little big longer than the inhalation helps to encourage relaxation.
Focusing your mental attention on consciously slowing the pace of your breath also helps to take your mind off of the pain of your labor surges to a degree. And many other mental coping strategies can be added to breath awareness to further contribute to pain relief.
Add Counting
Some people find counting a helpful tool. Although active labor contractions only last about a minute, a minute spent experiencing pain can feel like a much longer time.
Counting provides a mental distraction by giving the brain another task to focus on, while also helping you contextualize the passage of time.
There are many different ways you can incorporate counting during contractions:
Count your breath, counting either just on the inhalations, or both on the inhalations and the exhalations. Pick the counting rhythm that feels best to you.
When you breath slow and deep, you typically take about 10-12 breaths in a minute, so if you count your inhalations, you might chose to count your breaths to up 10, or to count up to 5 and then back down to 0.
Have your partner count slowly out loud for you. They could count your breaths, or they could slowly count up to a certain number, or up to a smaller number and then back down to zero. You can practice this with your partner before labor. Time yourself for a minute while slow breathing to see which method of counting you like best.
Photo by Natalie Broders
Add an Affirmation
Positive self-talk is very important during labor. Saying affirmations to yourself, either silently or out loud, or having your support team say affirmations to you can help keep you in the right frame of mind.
Affirmations can be added to your Labor Coping Layer Cake in a few different ways:
Say a short affirmation to yourself each time you exhale
Count each in-breath, then say a positive affirmation with your out-breath
Rhythmically count and chant and affirmation, for example “1-2-3, I am strong, 4-5-6, I am strong, 7-8-9, I am strong.”
Add Touch Stimuli
Positive touch is another powerful coping mechanism. Our brain is capable of processing a limited number of signals at a time, and if we stimulate our touch nerves in a positive way, that blocks some pain signals from getting through.
Touch may be self-massage, for example stroking your belly, or gently running your fingers up and down your arms.
Touch may be given by partners in many different ways: back massages, shoulder rubs, foot massages, effleurage, scalp massages, using hand-held massage tools.
Touch may also take the form of acupressure, such as squeezing a comb in your palm.
Add Auditory Stimuli
Listening to music, soothing nature sounds, or hypnobirthing tracks during labor provides your brain with another pleasant thing to focus on.
Music is a great option. Our brains love finding patterns, and music is full of patterns, so it is very engaging. It also encourages us to move and sway in tempo.
If you find music too distracting or worry that you’ll struggle to find music that fits your present mood, nature sounds like ocean waves or rain can encourage relaxation.
Many people find the practice of hypnobirthing helpful. The purpose of these tracks is train your body to consciously relax, but the tracks themselves are also soothing and encouraging in tone.
Photo by Tanya Hladik
Add Rhythmic Movement
Moving rhythmically is comforting, and also can help your baby find the best position in your pelvis.
Helpful rhythms include:
Rocking (on a birth ball, in a rocking chair)
Swaying
Slow dancing (either alone or with your partner)
Walking
Stair climbing
Gently bouncing on a birth ball
Tapping
Rhythmic movements also help take the edge off of pain by keeping your body loose. It’s important to avoid letting tension build in your muscles, because tension increases the perception of pain.
Add Your Imagination
Photo by Wild Light Collective
As your labor progresses, your brain moves into an altered state of consciousness where your inward focus is most important. At this time, your mind is also very open to suggestion, and engaging your imagination can be a powerful coping mechanism.
You can use your imagination in many different ways:
Have your support person coach you through guided meditations (many scripts can be found online)
Visualize that you are in a place that makes you feel calm, happy, at at peace (like the beach, the woods, your childhood bedroom)
Visualize that your body is engaged in a rhythmic activity, like floating down a river or riding ocean waves up and down.
Visualize your cervix opening, or holding your baby at the end of your birth journey
When you build a Labor Coping Labor Cake that works for you, remember to repeat it like a ritual for each of your contractions. This repetition will help you build confidence in your coping skills.
Keep using the ritual you have created until you find it is no longer working for you. Then you and your support team can work together to try new coping strategies to creating a new Layer Cake for the next phase of your labor.
Add Water
Most of the activities we’ve mentioned above can be done while in the tub or shower.
Hydrotherapy encourages relaxation and provides positive stimuli to the skin. Click here for more information about the benefits of hydrotherapy in labor.
Photo by Natalie Broders
Putting It All Together
The benefit of these coping strategies is that they can work in tandem to keep your mind busy and engaged by positive stimuli.
Here are a few examples of how you might build a Labor Coping Layer Cake:
Deep breathing, counting breaths while saying a positive affirmation on the exhalation, while you sway on a birth ball and your partner gently rubs your shoulder
Deep breathing, listening to music, slow dancing with your partner while you squeeze a comb in your hand for acupressure
Deep breathing, relaxing in a birth tub, listening to a guided meditation while your partner massages your scalp
Deep breathing, rocking in a rocking chair, rubbing your belly in a circle while your partner slowly counts up to 20 and back down to zero
Deep breathing, swaying in the shower, imaging you are standing under a warm waterfall in a tropical forest, while your partner encourages you with affirmations
Trial and Error
Not all of these techniques will be equally successful for you. It is important to experiment to find out which strategies fit your personality type and mesh with your preferred coping style.
Thinking about how you like to be treated when you are sick or how you deal with stress in your daily life is a good starting point. Things that work well for you at those times will likely work well for you in labor too.
You can also begin to practice some of these techniques before your labor starts. While engaged in light exercise, you can practice breathing slow and deep with intention, and practice how it feels to count your breaths or add an affirmation to the rhythm of your breathing.
You and your partner can also practice massage techniques and experiment with massage tools. This can help you communicate how and where you prefer to be touched so that your partner is ready with just the sort of soothing physical contact you like best on your baby’s birthday.
For more hands-on practice, you can also take our Comfort Measures for Birth class!
